acresofhope | (no subject)

I feel so lonely right now. Not alone, but lonely. It's not like I don't feel Him here with me. I know He is. I'm lonely for some human affection, someone to hug me and/or tell me everything's going to be okay. Someone human to talk to. I know I need God more than people, but for some reason I don't think God created us to be without other humans.

Maybe I'm just being selfish, because I've been doing an awful lot of that over the past few months without even realizing it. I don't know anymore. Sometime in the future I will, but not yet. I don't blame those who don't trust me anymore, because I don't trust me either. If it's at all possible, I'm going to find you guys one day so I can apologize to you all in person.

I don't know what else to write, except to warn everyone reading this not to compromise even the slightest bit. You'll just keep doing it little by little until you're in over your head. You might not even realize how bad it is until someone leaves you. I don't want that to happen to any of you.

And be careful what you pray for. God is faithful, He will answer you, and it might be painful. I know it is for me right now. Be sure you're ready for it. I know everything will be okay, because even though these people aren't speaking to me, they are Christ followers, and those relationships will be restored eventually, even if it's in Heaven. I do hope, though, that it'll be before then.

I need to go to sleep.