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can't sleep
Oct. 22nd, 2006 02:50 amAs much as I'd like to sleep right now, I can't. Normally I'd think it had something to do with the fact that I hardly ever go to bed before 3 am, but I know that's not it tonight.
I had an 'ouch' moment on Friday while listening to John Piper preach. He was outlining how to fight against sin (and I plan on memorizing those and the verses that go with them). Toward the end he said, "When you meet sin, you win to the degree that you have looked upon God and all that He has done for you and counted Him precious and a treasure so that He is preferable to that deadly, lying, Judas [betraying] desire." So basically, for the past however long it's been (and the fact that I don't know how long scares me), I haven't been very satisfied with Christ, and we all know that isn't His fault. Ouch is right.
Even so, though knowing this make fighting really easy compared to previously, it is still very difficult, at least in the area of romance and sexuality. Marie has suggested to me that this may be a thorn in my flesh, just as Paul had. Not that mine is the same thorn as his was. There's no way I could know that was, since he really didn't mention any details. Still, I thought I'd look into this whole 'thorn' thing.
He (Paul) mentioned the 'thorn' in 2 Corinthians 12:7, calling the 'thorn' "a messenger of Satan to torment me". It was given to him, he says, to keep him from becoming conceited because of all the things Christ revealed to him. I don't think I've been given anything near what Paul was given, but that doesn't matter. The next verses (verses 8-9) are what encourage me.
Standing on my own, I am a lustful, prideful, deceitful, lazy, jealous, insolent, foul-mouthed idolatress. (There could probably be more to that sentence, but that would take forever.) But thanks be to God through Jesus Christ my Lord that I don't stand on my own! There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus! (Romans 8:1) In Christ I am no longer those things in my inner being, but I have the righteousness of Christ Himself! It is the most glorious thing that could ever happen to a person!
I don't even have the words to go on right now. Or actually, I do, but there are too many of them to organize at this hour. Until morning.
I had an 'ouch' moment on Friday while listening to John Piper preach. He was outlining how to fight against sin (and I plan on memorizing those and the verses that go with them). Toward the end he said, "When you meet sin, you win to the degree that you have looked upon God and all that He has done for you and counted Him precious and a treasure so that He is preferable to that deadly, lying, Judas [betraying] desire." So basically, for the past however long it's been (and the fact that I don't know how long scares me), I haven't been very satisfied with Christ, and we all know that isn't His fault. Ouch is right.
Even so, though knowing this make fighting really easy compared to previously, it is still very difficult, at least in the area of romance and sexuality. Marie has suggested to me that this may be a thorn in my flesh, just as Paul had. Not that mine is the same thorn as his was. There's no way I could know that was, since he really didn't mention any details. Still, I thought I'd look into this whole 'thorn' thing.
He (Paul) mentioned the 'thorn' in 2 Corinthians 12:7, calling the 'thorn' "a messenger of Satan to torment me". It was given to him, he says, to keep him from becoming conceited because of all the things Christ revealed to him. I don't think I've been given anything near what Paul was given, but that doesn't matter. The next verses (verses 8-9) are what encourage me.
Concerning this I implored the Lord three times that it might leave me.
And He has said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness." Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me.
Standing on my own, I am a lustful, prideful, deceitful, lazy, jealous, insolent, foul-mouthed idolatress. (There could probably be more to that sentence, but that would take forever.) But thanks be to God through Jesus Christ my Lord that I don't stand on my own! There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus! (Romans 8:1) In Christ I am no longer those things in my inner being, but I have the righteousness of Christ Himself! It is the most glorious thing that could ever happen to a person!
I don't even have the words to go on right now. Or actually, I do, but there are too many of them to organize at this hour. Until morning.
